You have to understand her in order to understand how she loves and the way she loves. She has gone through the unimaginable but still believes in the magic of love, despite it all. She was broken, bruised and left to fend for herself but she managed to put herself back together again -broken pieces and all. It would have been easy of her to build up a wall so high it would take an army of 1,000 to break down. It would have been easy for her to take her heart of gold and turn it into ice. But no, she didn’t do that. She doesn’t know how to do that. She still believes in the magic of love. She still believes there is someone out there that can love her despite what she has been through, despite her flaws, despite her imperfections. She still believes that someone will one day love her the way she deserves to be loved and never run, despite how ugly her past is and how it sometimes creeps back in with her insecurities.

She chooses to love without holding back. She has tried that route -loving with conditions but it just wasn’t meant for her. She wears her heart on her sleeve and isn’t afraid to admit she loves you. She isn’t afraid to admit she cares. She is an open book despite being punished in the past for it. She will make the time for you; she will message back immediately, she will go above and beyond and she will no doubt be the person you can count on. She isn’t here to play games -she’s much too old and seasoned for that. You see, she understands what it’s like to be hurt. She understands pain, heartbreak and disappointment. She doesn’t want to cause that kind of pain to anybody else and doesn’t want to make anybody else pay for the true pain she has endured.

She is all in or not at all. She has learned that life is too short to live half-assed, especially giving half-assed love. She has carried heavy burdens by herself, burdens that nobody ever knew of. She knows what it feels like to be alone and she doesn’t want that for the one she loves. She is there for it all. There for the good, the bad, the ugly and all the in-between. She is not interested in a part-time position in anybody’s life and she isn’t interested in giving someone a part-time job. She wants to work through the issues and laugh through the silly disagreements. She wants to create memories.

You see, she understands love isn’t easy, but she still believes in the goodness of it all. She still believes in her person, when she does find her person. But understand this, if you don’t love her right. If she feels she is having to beg for your love, time or attention, she has no problems walking away. That doesn’t mean she wants to, it’s probably the hardest thing she has ever had to do but she probably gave you all and then some -but she cannot give from an empty bucket. Love isn’t a maybe thing. Love isn’t a sometimes thing. She isn’t going to wait around for someone to see she’s worth it because she already knows she is worth it, and she doesn’t have time for people who don’t see that. So, while she may be imperfect and difficult at times understand her heart is pure and the love she feels is real. She doesn’t walk away without giving her all in something that felt so promising at one point. She will always care and love for the person in her life, but she will no longer settle for part-time partners or lovers. She is strong, she is me.